i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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