Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
