He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
