when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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