I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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