I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
