I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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