question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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