I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
