week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
