i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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