that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
