You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
