I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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