distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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