he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
