Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
