Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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