I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize