I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
