THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize