I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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