He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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