Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
