is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
