she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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