You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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