When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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