I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
