If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
