why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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