My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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