Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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