i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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