okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize