just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The beer is more important than you right now.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
