Walk of Shame. In a state park.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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