He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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