So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
is wine microwaveable?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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