its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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