I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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