yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize