Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
