I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
