can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
