she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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