I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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