we have officially lost it.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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