He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
