i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize