i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's never too late to be topless.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
